Tips for Stay at Home Mums

Some people dream of the day that they have children and can stay at home with them, however, the reality of this can come as a huge shock as mothers struggle to cope with the huge change being a stay at home mom is. Mothers can suffer with their identity and can struggle with trying to find balance in their life as they feel all consumed by their role of mother as nothing else. There are ways in which mothers can stay sane though and really appreciate their role as stay at home mom.

1. Get out.
It will be hard to keep sane if you are stuck in the house, staring at the same four walls every single day. The actual process of leaving the house can be hard work as you try to get yourself and your young children ready sometimes it can seem like a bit of a battle but the achievement of just getting out of the house in itself can be very beneficial. Getting out of the house will not only help yourself but your children too who will get to experience more things.

2. Where to go.
Find out about what is on in your local area and get involved in it. There may be regular moms and tots groups to attend or baby swimming glasses or story time at your local library. Once you get out and about to these classes and make it a regular thing it will add structure to your week and help you to meet other people in a similar situation. It will give you a sense of purpose again as you focus on going to these events.

3. Make friends.
One of the most difficult parts of staying at home can be the fact that it can be very lonely and lack in adult conversation. You may be used to working with lots of people and suddenly you find yourself isolated with your children and no matter how much you love them you can find yourself pining for adult company. If you go to baby groups and classes you will soon find other people in similar positions to yourself and make friends this way. There are also some websites which help to connect stay at home moms and you can start coffee mornings, go on walks with them or create a baby sitting circle. Having friends will help you immensely to feel connected and to talk through your concerns.

4. Get a hobby.
When you are a stay at home mom it can be very easy to lose sense of who you are. You think about your children, you plan for them, you work your day out around them but what about you? Just focussing on your children can cause problems as you try to work out what your identity now is. Try to find time to fit in a hobby or interest so that you can take on a role as you and not just mummy. This hobby may involve going to the gym once a week or attending an evening course. Whatever it is it will help you to feel better about yourself as you are taking some time to embrace your interests too which you are more than deserving to do- children do not always have to be your only drive.

5. You time.
As difficult as it may be try to fit in some ‘you’ time every day. This doesn’t have to be a huge amount of time, perhaps just fifteen minutes reading your book or a half hour soak in the bath without your children present. It will give you the time to unwind and to focus on yourself for a while instead of just your children. You spend your day rushing around and caring for other people so you are deserving and in need of just some time to yourself.

6. It’s just a phase!
One thing which can really make a mother feel as though she is going insane and wonders whether she did the right thing by staying off work is when children pass through phases. It may be the terrible twos as your child is trying to test their boundaries or may be the teething stage where sleep is limited and your baby is restless. You may really struggle and wonder why you thought staying at home was a good idea but just remember it is a phase and all phases pass eventually. Keeping this in mind will help you to deal with these times.

Deciding to be a stay at home mom is a difficult decision to make and it isn’t all as perfect as some people suggest it is. It can be extremely challenging and put a strain upon a woman but it is possible to make it easier and to enjoy this venture.