Strategies for Coping with and Helping Loud Children

My children are loud! I will be the first to admit that they probably get this wonderful trait from me! I talk loud and when I get excited about something the decibel level tends to increase. My children are the same way. I have been blessed with children that enjoy life to the fullest and want everyone to know it. As an adult, I have learned when being loud is appropriate and when I need to use a quieter voice. This is difficult for children to learn. There are several different ways to teach this to children and to keep reinforcing it because it will take a while.

We use a term called ‘quiet voice’ when we want our children to talk softer. Usually this is when we are inside of a building or house and it is not appropriate to yell or talk loudly. We simply remind them to use a quiet voice before we enter a situation like this and then remind them often throughout the stay.

Another strategy that works well for older children is to talk about voice levels in terms of 0-1-2-3-4-5 with 5 being yelling on the playground and 0 being no talking at all. This helps a lot and minimizes the amount of correction that you must do. You simply say, “Please use a 2 voice.” It may take some teaching before your child fully understands what level voice is appropriate in certain situations.

You can also relate the voice level to the distance that they are from an individual. We use this strategy with my seven year old. When he is talking loud at dinner, we ask him how far away we are and he usually self corrects his voice level. I know he is excited about something he is sharing, but I want him to learn appropriate levels at home so that when he is not with us, he remembers.

It may be a good idea to have your child’s hearing checked if they speak loud and do it often. Sometimes this is an indicator that they may be having trouble hearing. I recently had three different people within a few weeks ask me if my son had trouble hearing. Of course I knew this was because he is loud. During his last doctor visit I talked with the pediatrician and had his ears tested. His hearing is completely normal. He is just a loud talker, but is learning to have more self-control in this area.

Often times loud children may be portrayed as difficult or wanting to be the center of attention all the time. Trust me when I say, both have been said of my children. As a parent, this may be quite bothersome to you and it may be true to some degree. That being said, children that are loud are probably confident too! They more than likely have strong character and leadership qualities. They need your help to teach them how to use this gifting for good and to benefit themselves and those around them.