Parenting Tips how to Eliminate Childrens Backtalk

Every child will try to get his own way through backtalk at some stage during his development. It is a parent’s duty is to stop this behavior before it becomes habitual.

Children are not born with good manners; they need to learn how to interact appropriately with adults and peers. Otherwise, as they grow older, they will find themselves rejected, isolated and unpopular and no parent wants to see their child in that unfortunate position.

Parents may use some or all of the following tips to help them raise respectful and polite children.

 * Lay down the ground rules

During a calm period, impress upon the child that, in his family, people must treat each other with respect. Disrespectful words or gestures are not allowed and will result in consequences. State the punishment and gear it to the child’s age: a preschooler may be given a short time-out, an older child may lose TV privileges for an evening. Once you’ve imposed a consequence, never fail to carry through.

* Model respectful behavior

Children are great mimics. They will model the verbal practices of their parents. If you become involved in a disagreement with another adult in the child’s presence, do not lose your temper. Use logic and reason to make your point in a calm manner. If the other person loses control, walk away, saying, “We’ll discuss this matter when you’re calmer.”

* Refuse to get into a debate

When the child asks to do something which is not in his best interest, just keep repeating the appropriate house rule. ”Your bedtime is at 8 o’clock on weekdays.”  If he tries to argue, remind him that he is being disrespectful and risking the applicable consequence. If he persists, impose the punishment. 

* Set a time for discussion

If you feel the child should have a platform to discuss his opinion or request, set a definite time. “We can discuss the matter this evening between 7:00 and 7:10 P.M.” Encourage him to prepare points to support his line of reasoning; older children may wish to write them down. Listen carefully and come to a fair conclusion, giving the reasons for your decision. No raised voices are permitted and the parent must stay in control of the situation.  Conclude the discussion on time.

* Praise and reward good behavior

When you see or hear the child being polite and respectful either to you, a child or another adult, praise and reward him with a special treat, and give yourself an invisible pat on the back. You know that your training is being effective.

It is important to curb a child’s attempts to backtalk early. The toddler who sticks out his tongue and yells “Bad mommy!”  can quickly morph into a verbally abusive teenager if not corrected. In addition, there will probably be many unpleasant episodes with other children, family, friends, neighbors and teachers in the years between.

Socializing the child is one of a parent’s most important duties. Failure to do so will result in an unhappy, unsuccessful young person, and an embarrassed, discouraged, and verbally abused parent.  Following the above suggestions consistently, beginning at an early age, will help avoid this tragic outcome.