How to tell a Girl you Love her

Your high school years can be filled with emotions. From the sadness of a breakup to the excitement of a new relationship, it can be hard to keep up with it all, let alone know where your girlfriend is coming from. You find yourself filled with feelings that are new and exciting, and yet kind of scary. You’ve kissed her, held her hand, and crossed many barriers with her. You think you may even love her. But when should you tell her?

The obvious answer should be when you feel it, but that is not always how it works, especially when you are young. Often times, the emotion of love can be mixed up with many others, including happiness, lust, and even just plain like. When preparing to say those three words, you should be aware of the commitment that comes along with them. Is your girlfriend the only girl you want to be with? Are you ready to commit fully to her, and maybe sacrifice some of your video game time to talk on the phone with her? Are you willing to sit through Twilight to make her smile? If the answer is yes, then you may really love her. Just make sure she is not the third girlfriend you have told this to in three weeks.

First, try to anticipate her reaction. Start using the word “love” more often in day-to-day conversation, such as “I love this pizza” or “I love your hair like that.” Test her reaction to your usage of the word. Does she cringe? Blush? Smile? If the word love makes her cringe, you may want to hold off on declaring your undying love for her just yet.

Say it at the end of a phone call. When you are getting off the phone with her after a normal conversation, slip in, “goodnight, I love you.” See if she says she loves you too, or if she asks what you are talking about. While this is commonly viewed as the cowardly way, it can be equally as effective as anything else.

Be a romantic. After a nice dinner, look into her eyes and confess that you think you love her. Keep eye contact constant, and let her know that you are serious. If she says she does not feel the same, or isn’t ready, don’t be offended. Just tell her that it is okay and you just wanted her to know, and move about with your evening. Don’t let the feelings of awkwardness set in, or they may never leave.

Don’t say it right away, just show her. Do nice little things that take you out of your way just to see her smile. If she can feel it, she is more likely to believe you.

Do not tell her via text messaging, Facebook, or instant messaging. These are both cheesy and impersonal, and she is not likely to appreciate the value of the words through text. Also, do not say it in hopes of convincing her to have sex with you. Chances are, she’s still not going to sleep with you, and you will be in the relationship deeper than ever before. Think in terms of love, not lust.

Even if she says no, remember that feelings change, and she may at some point see that she loves you as well. If she doesn’t, she is not the only girl in the world. Just remember to be sincere, committed, and dedicated, and she will see that she has a great man on her hands deserving of the love you want.