Holding Won’t Spoil a Baby

When I was pregnant, I received many tips from other people about what to do and not to do once my child was born. I heard several times that holding the baby to long would make them spoiled. People telling me this bothered me in several ways and even more so after my son was born.

For nine months my son was as close to me, as close as we will ever get. Then he was pushed out, away, on his own. No longer was he safely wrapped in the womb of his mother. I still to this day do not know who took that harder, him or me. He was born late at night, during a full moon in a busy hospital. It was the longest night of my life. Tired from a day of labor but excited at the same time of finally getting to met my little man. I didn’t really get to hold him until the next morning and I knew from that moment on that holding him would not spoil him.

The first month was a very long and hard month. I held him when he cried, sometimes until 4 in the morning when he would finally fall asleep for a couple hours. I held him when he needed it, when I needed it. I believe that in holding him he felt safe and secure. Most of all I knew I had his trust. Building a bond like no other from early on was very important to me.

He is growing up so quickly, not needing my arms as much as before to satisfy him. He discovers something new every day. While at night he still needs my arms, I don’t mind and I don’t see it as him being spoiled. The day time he is the growing boy out to discover the world but at night he is still my little man who needs his mothers arms to fall asleep.

Do I think when he is 13 years old he will still need my arms to fall asleep? No, I rather doubt it. He will be growing up, not needing his mother like he use to. It makes me cherish holding him even more now for I know one day he will be “to old” for his mother to hold him.

As for the people that gave me the advice not to hold him to long for it will spoil him, I have to sit and wonder if they truely believe it. My father was one of those people who told me that but he holds my son almost more than anyone else. I believe it’s one of those phrases that is easy to say to someone but once you see the child, it goes out the window. I have never heard in my life “They are spoiled because they was held to much as a child” when talking about an adult.

They are only babies once, hold them as long as you or they want. It won’t spoil them.