Grandparent Favoritism Diversion Methods

Being a parent of more than one child is hard, so I can imagine how hard it is being a grandparent to more than one child. In my family, we have a lot of grandchildren. My mother had just us three, but she has nine grandchildren. So first hand I see her issues, however I do believe that she shows my older sister’s kids more attention sometimes. It is so hard when you see favorites going on because at some point in time you know that your child will see their grandparent showing favoritism to one of their cousins. It makes kids feel as if something about them is not special enough to receive the same time and attention that should also be their’s. No one wants their child to feel that way, so I am writing this so that other parents in my situation can avoid it or at at least soften the blow.

You would think the easier thing would be is to talk with the grandparent and point out the problem. I have found that this method is the worst move to make in most scenarios. One of the better ways would be to use that energy and think of different ways to help your child cope. One way would be is to let your child spend more time with other family members, like other grandparents, aunts, uncles, and older cousins. Each person your child is closer to makes your child feel special in different ways and this can be a big diversion from the fact that their grandparent may not be providing them with as much attention as they like. I also found this method to be more effective with the grandparent too because when they make the time for your child your child may not be around, and they might feel the need to make up for lost time when the child is around. I found that in my situation when my kids were with their other relatives and their grandparent called for their time , when they got the time with them it was all about them and no other children were involved. Sometimes giving out a dose of their medicine can help them see the light. When a child spends lots of quality time with other relatives they tend to talk about them more and the grandparent is going to want the same attention from the grandchild.

Another method would be to request that when it is time for the grandparent to spend time with your child make sure that they bring no one with them. It will also ensure that the visit is all about the child and no one else. If this can not be done you can always invite the grandparent to more family night activites and dinners. More time can be positive because it will increase the closeness of the family. Constantly bickering about the situation is not at all helpful, trust me. Sooner or later the grandparent will get the point.