First time dads can experience a wide range of emotions

Being a first time father is an incredible feeling that is truly hard to explain. You go through such a range of wild emotions throughout the entire pregnancy and throughout the entire birthing process. While your spouse has similar emotions, they are definitely different than what you are experiencing yourself. With each stage of the pregnancy, your feelings are going to become much different, until eventually the child is born. It is literally a 9 month emotional roller coaster.

To best describe the emotions felt, you really have to break them down into different parts of the pregnancy:

Initial reaction to pregnancy

For many in modern times, discovering that you spouse is pregnant is a major surprise, especially if she was on birth control. This can lead to numerous different reactions that are perfectly normal and should be expected in such a situation.

For those fathers that didn’t want a child, this time is often somewhat sad and disappointing. They try to be strong and show that they are supportive, but at the same time they are thinking about how bad it is going to be now that they have a child. They are thinking about everything that they are no longer going to be able to do with their friends or with their partner.

For those fathers that are happy about the news, they are going to begin calling everyone, but they aren’t going to have a clue what to say beyond that they are having a baby. They are going to tell everyone about it, as if it’s completely unique to them that they have a child. This is also where they begin talking about the child whenever they get a chance to bring it up.

Month 3

The pregnancy is starting to sink in completely and the realization that the father doesn’t have a clue what to do when the child is here is starting to come up. The father doesn’t want to attend the parenting and baby classes, but is so nervous about killing the baby that they are fighting the battle in their head over what they need to do. Generally, they will give in and go to a few classes as long as there are other males in the room when they walk in. If there are no males, they debate whether they want to go or not.

This is where everything starts to become reality and you have to start planning things out a little bit more, but nothing is quite set in stone yet.

Month 6

This is where things start to become a little more anxious. You already know the sex of your child and you know that the baby is coming soon. So now the male is rushing around trying to think of ways to make extra money to get more stuff for the baby. The male is also running around trying to take care of the pregnant partner, getting her all sorts of foods for her cravings, and for the most part fending for themselves during meal times, because their partner doesn’t feel like any of the foods that they want to eat. The partner just wants simple things that they can have NOW NOW NOW.

This is where the male really begins to get sick of going to the store in the middle of the night, rubbing feet and backs, adjusting pillows, and changing the thermostat. Everything is becoming close to reality so the male is also worried about not being prepared enough for the baby and begins doing their research online, reading books, and trying to learn about being a father without their spouse knowing about it. They want to appear strong and confident, not completely nervous and scared for the life of a small child that they will soon be responsible for.

This is when the father is gaining a lot of weight, because they are trying to eat to make their partner feel better about their increase in food intake. This of course stresses them out as they feel as if they are the one that is pregnant.

Month 9

The baby is about to come out and now it’s go time. The father is worried about driving and making it to the hospital on time. The father has probably already driven the route to the hospital 50 times by now and is worried about getting stuck in traffic. Virtually every disaster scenario has been played out in his head. They are thinking delivering a baby in a snowstorm with a due date in June In Phoenix. Every possible freak scenario is being evaluated and the solutions being considered so that the father knows how to react.

The father is also getting ready the diaper bag and all of the clothes that the partner is going to need while at the hospital. They are already thinking ahead and stocking up on beef jerky, trail mix, and Gatorade to help them make it through the time in the hospital. The travel kit and everything is already set up.

This is when the father will start to lose a lot of weight, because they are so paranoid about leaving their partner’s side that they begin to spend more time with her rather than leaving to get something to eat. Even when getting food for their partner, they only grab a quick bite for themselves and get back to their partner’s side.

Finally, by the time the baby is born, the emotional roller coaster is over, the sudden freak outs to make sure that you have the right supplies, that you have enough clothing that it is the right size, that you have everything baby proofed. You have truly run yourself mad over the last 9 months trying to get everything setup and mentally prepare yourself and now by the time the baby is born and things start to slow down a bit, you realize just how insane you were over the last 9 months and that most of it really wasn’t anything to stress about.