Does Spanking Work for Disciplining Kids – Yes

Kids need discipline.
Without discipline, they are lost.
Their brains are continually growing and developing. They suffer growing spurts, aches in their muscles and joints that feel almost arthritic at times – and as they do not develop their peripheral vision until they are at least thirteen, their core balance shifts and changes constantly. For example, a child who might dive perfectly one day will, in the space of a growing spurt week, land off center in a stupendous belly whacker! Why? Because they are no longer working within the spatial perimeters they had become accustomed to a few weeks/months earlier! They have added 2 to 3 centimeters to their height and length, and this unbalanced shift is just another of a series of stages where the very process of being in this world is a struggle from the very beginning!
Of all creatures, the Human Being, as we all know, starts out as the most helpless. YEARS, as compared to other mammals’ WEEKS!
We need to be guided, just as much as we need to be encouraged to sit, crawl, walk, be toilet trained, taught how to feed, tie our shoelaces, dress ourselves, MAKE WORDS MAKE SENSE – and ultimately,to relate effectively to other Human Beings – or suffer, dreadfully!
Kids cannot teach all this to themselves! Can YOU imagine yourself teaching yourself all this at these early ages and stages? I know I could not have!
The parents, the adults who have all gone before them, are the only ones who can teach the New Beings’ growing bodies and minds essential life skills.
Now. Spanking.
HOW do people apply it!
Do you begin with a light, but firm, tap on the hand and a ‘Don’t Touch!’when the baby reaches the Mobile Monster Stage – often WITHOUT LANGUAGE, but with a lot of excess PHYSICAL ENERGY and CURIOSITY?
Little people are quick to pick up on sounds and their essential meaning without words. My daughter would nod her head when I applied the above method. I was able to get through to her, from the tender age of 12 months, that touching other peoples’ things was not right. This was how discipline began in my life, and this was my first big guide for her. At the same time, I was surrounded by parents who did not know this. They would sit, smiling and squirming, and try to catch whatever their little darling was playing with before any breakage! These people were the advocates of the NO SPANKING Brigade. For a little while, I bit my tongue, and just placed my own no touch items well out of reach before any visit. Eventually, I lost my patience, and showed them WHY my daughter never touched theirs! They applied, with vigilance – only because I put the point across that only after very few episodes of the LIGHT TAPS, the child would understand the TONE of voice so that tapping would no longer be necessary!
Now, I ask you!
On a bus, a train – I once saw an angry dad park outside my place, place the misbehaving toddler, still strapped in his baby seat, on my nature strip, and then DRIVE OFF AROUND THE BLOCK TO TEACH HIM A LESSON! The two year old was blue in the face with panic – and yes, the dad simply could not come at the idea of a spank – having been ‘spanked’ with a belt by his father, and made to feel ‘A bloody idiot!’ because of it! I just had to tell him: ‘I’m sorry, really sorry! You were BELTED! Not ‘spanked!”
I firmly believe that it is HOW we discipline that matters!
Belts, rulers,wooden spoons, and those awful canes Private religious one sex schools used to use ARE taking the message TOO FAR and breeding nothing but FEAR, RESENTMENT and AGGRESSION in a child’s growing brain!
But to not be FIRM and DEFINITE about a child’s perimeters is just as abusive!
You can’t afford to sit back and let the kids find out for themselves!
They are LOST without definitions!
Both ‘treatments’ and ‘non treatments’ are leaving them in Limbo.
If you want to know how I worked this out?
Well, I had a dad who disciplined with his tone, and a mother who completely lost it when menopausal and tried to belt up the house and us!
Keep in mind, though, that she was the one who got the firm, loving message of Don’t Touch across in the first place – so as a parent myself, I can fully understand that, in a decade where menopause was seen as a Neurotic Womans’ Problem, and there was no hormonal help or friendly support available as there is now, she is easily forgiven (but not before I was a parent myself!)
Let’s just put this SPANKING THING down to a FIRM TAP. It doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t shatter self esteem, but it emphasizes the TONE OF VOICE we so need to keep that guidance that we love to share in our friendly moments with our kids in perspective and balance for them!
I am really ANNOYED that kids these days address adults by their first names. I TRIED to bring my daughter up addressing people as MR and MRS (and she will, as a teenager) still do this with her teachers (simply because the school demands it!) But AUNTIE AND UNCLE?
‘They’re not my REAL AUNTIE AND UNCLE, Mum! They’re Jack and Jo!”
(To which Jack and Jo preen, as they do so love to be acknowledged as the kids’ Big Friends!)
Or Another Kids’ mum: ‘Just call me Geraldine, Keira!” None of this helps to give the kids the DISTINCTION they need between the generations so that they KNOW that they are the YOUNGER, and definitely NOT THE EQUAL!
So, I had to give up on that one.
Oh, by the way.
Any SMACK DISCIPLINE needs to be well and truly established with TONE OF VERSE early in the piece. If Kids don’t learn early, they WILL NEVER TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY, and you’ll be derided as too little, too late.
By the time they are in their teens, they are too busy forming their own opinions of themselves rather than listening to you!
So you had just better hope that they remember you as an adult who was FIRM but CARED, as smacking after the age of 10 truly undermines their intelligence, where as clear definitions and tone of voice does not!