Children Child Rearing Child Discipline Bad Behavior Parent Parent Responsibility – Parents

Anytime a child screams or throws a tantrum in a public place, everyone in the close vicinity instantly turns to look at the offending child and embarrassed parent. At that point, the parent’s facial expression might appear to express exhaustion or resignation.

Many times, parents know when their child is misbehaving or is spoiled. But they do not do anything about it because they find ways to justify their child’s behavior. Justifying bad behavior does not help the situation. It only encourages future bad behavior. Since the parents are complicit in their child’s bad behavior, they are to blame when their child behaves badly.

What are some of the reasons parents use to justify their child’s bad behavior? And why is their logic inaccurate?

(1) They justify bad behavior when the child is young.

Some parents do not realize that all people are born with the tendency to be selfish. That means that a child wants his way at all times. Although a child is young, children are very intelligent. Scientists have found that babies as young as 4 months old are able to use logic and reason when observing a situation. Since from birth crying is the only way that they could communicate, children use temper tantrums, screaming and crying to express their displeasure of not getting what they wanted. If the parent makes excuses for the child instead of addressing the situation, the child gets the message that a tantrum will help manipulate a situation to get what he wants.

(2) They fail to teach concepts for the child to be well behaved.

Children have a myopic view of life as they grow up. It is the parents’ responsibility to teach them that the world does not revolve around them. From an early age, children should be taught socially acceptable behavior. For example, a child should be taught to respect adults.  They need to be taught not to hit others when things do not go their way. They should be taught that they will not always get everything they want. They need to be taught to respect the rights and property of others. They need to be taught to share and to be compassionate. If the parent does not teach their children these principles, the child be frustrated and act out by demonstrating bad behavior.

 (3) They do not discipline or set boundaries for their young child.

A child’s personality determines what methods a parent should use to train their child. These methods should include sometime of type of discipline and an acknowledgement of boundaries. It is up to the parent to decide what discipline that will be used. If one form of discipline is not effective, then the parent should try something else.

Some parents do not know how to deal with their children. They complain that whatever they try, he will not listen. He screams or hits when he does not get his way. Is that acceptable behavior? No. Training a child does not start when he is 5 – 10 years old, it starts when he is a baby. If it is instilled in him from an early age how to behave, he will learn what acceptable behavior is. Children will scream, kick, shout, bite, and hit whoever is around them when they get upset. They are young. They do not know that they are supposed to control their anger. It is the parent’s responsibility to train them early in life as to what is acceptable and what is unacceptable. If the parent does not work to control their child’s outburst early, the child will continue to do whatever it takes to manipulate the people around them to get their way.

It can be tiresome dealing with a strong willed child who is determined to get their way. During the formative years of a child’s life, it can be a battle of wills to teach the child the proper way to behave. However difficult, it is the responsibility of the parent to teach the child the principles that  will serve them for the rest of their lives. It is important that the parent does not give up, but is just as persistent as the child. In the end, the parent is responsible for the unruly behavior of a young child in public.