Bonding Activities for Mothers and Pre Teen Sons

The pre-teen years can be a rough and tumultuous time for boys, and this can cause distance between a mother and her son. Boys can go from hugging and loving with their mothers, to speaking in grunts and groans when spoken to. They may want to lock themselves in their room and ignore the bond that was formed between mother and son from birth. Trying to encourage this bond can be met with teen angst and animosity, but preserving this bond can be made easier by changing the way you spend time with your pre-teen son. Eventually, they will grow out of this stage, but by then, they may be out of the house with a life of their own. Here are some great bonding activities to help mothers spend quality time with their sons.

Video games

If your son is into video games, you may want to use this to your advantage. True, you may not want to spend your time killing Nazi zombies on Call of Duty, but there are many video games that you and your son might enjoy. Whether you are playing on a Wii, XBOX, or Playstation gaming system, there are hundreds of video games that you and your son could possibly enjoy together.  Why not try challenging each other to a dance off in Just Dance or a racing game such as Super Mario Racing.


Boys love collections. Whether it is rocks, coins, stamps, etc. there is an endless array of different collections that your son may be interested in. Starting a collection together can bring you closer as mother and son, and he will find excitement in adding to your collection together. Many state and county fairs also have contests for collections, including a category for children, which can make this activity even more fun.

Music trivia

By the pre-teen years, your son may have shown an interest in music. He may also be surprised to know that there was once a time when you knew every lyric to every Nirvana song, and dreamt about marrying Trent Reznor or Vanilla Ice.  You could try creating your own version of music trivia with your son by making a list of trivia questions from your own generation of music, and let him do the same. Then you can quiz each other on different genres of music.  You might be surprised at what he knows about your generation’s music, and he may be surprised as well at how much you know about today’s hits.


Sports are not just a boys’ bonding activity. Although you may not enjoy catching the game on TV, you may enjoy playing a game of soccer or basketball in the backyard with your son (where his friends can’t see you, of course). This is a great way for him to show you some tricks (or vice versa), enjoy the fresh outdoors, and sneak in a little exercise as well.


Boys may not seem very interested in gardening at first, but they might be interested in the fruits of their labor. Try taking your son to your local nursery or home improvement store and find some fruits or vegetables (maybe some hot peppers) that he may enjoy growing and cultivating.  He may love harvesting the crops that you both worked so hard to grow.

Bonding with your son is important, even in the pre-teen years. His interests will be growing and changing and this can be a great time for you both to find a new interest together.