Advice from Grandparents for a Happy Marriage

Both sets of my grandparents were happily married forever! This is a little of their wisdom that I’ve found so true:

*Make a list of the top ten things you will never forgive. Burn the list.

Willingness to forgive is necessary to every healthy relationship, all the more so in a marriage. While the list of things we may never forgive may change over the years, holding onto a strict set of “rules” will cripple us, not protect us.

*Show appreciation daily.

Good manners are the lubricant of our society. This is ever so more evident in marriage. Please, thank you, excuse me; these are common courtesies that enrich our partnership. Taking someone for granted will destroy friendships and business relationships. Our marriage is worth far more than either/both of these others.

*Tell each other about your love for him/her often.

Expressing our love can take the many forms like bringing home a paycheck, cooking dinner, doing the laundry, or a night out on the town. None of this, however, replaces hearing “I love you because you are the kindest person I’ve ever known” or “Did you know you were the most handsome man in the restaurant tonight? I love you so much.” Our endearing thoughts need to be expressed regularly.

*Dress well for each other and let it be known.

Ask, “Do you like this color?” or “Do you like this tie?” Don’t ask “Does my butt look fat?” or “Does this tie and belt go together?” Our goal needs to be pleasing our marriage partner, because we really can tell if our own butt looks fat and that ties and belts never need to match. If our partner asks us these questions, it may be because more tender reassurance is needed. Strive to let each other know what looks best and dress to impress the one that really counts.

Watching my Grandparents and my parents through the years has taught me much. Genuine love, respect and admiration for our spouse is critical, but if they don’t hear it, feel it, and know it now, it is something we can remedy right away! What gift could be more wonderful?